Time Loop

Eudora Welty writes of a life being defined by the continuity of its love. By this measure, mine is large & grand.

On Thursday, September 26, 2024, I entered a time loop.

It began during dinner with Sam and Annie at Vinaigrette. In between bites of a decadent brownie and lemon cheesecake, we discussed planetary alignments and our commitment to community-building in smaller localities. We talked about the significance of this 15-year loop; I recalled the difficult circumstances I faced at this point in 2009, and I felt even deeper appreciation for the clarity & boundaries that characterize this phase of my life.

We soon were back in Albuquerque, at the wedding where we met. Laughs combined with shared political values to forge lifelong friendships.

I continued to the Austin Film Society with Jessie and Gabby. We watched a documentary on the horrors of modern U.S. imperialism - as manifested by the evil law enforcement apparatus that patrols its southern border.

We conversed in the lobby, and then I found myself back in their yard during a Passover Seder. We exchanged notes of gratitude, played the traditional games of the holiday, and extended solidarity to the people of Palestine from thousands of miles away.

I grabbed lunch with Juany before I caught a flight to Columbus. We looked over the rooftop of the restaurant from an elevated patio, and we took in an impressive view of the city that has captured our hearts.

I went back to our virtual meeting in 2021 - both in earlier stages of our public service careers, yet still laser focused on using as many avenues within American politics as we could to advance the interests of working class people.

I took Lashell to lunch on Saturday. We laughed heartily over cracked crab legs and small bits of leftover potatoes on our plates. We generated warmth in the middle of a cool rainy day.

I was back on the bus where we met in 2005, shuttling from church to play practice. I slid closer to her, as I built up the courage to speak to her for the first time. I’m so glad I ultimately did.

Caja and I arrived at the wedding with the rain gently falling on us. We greeted fellow guests in the elevator and at our table. We hugged members of the wedding party and marveled at twenty years of friendship with the bride.

We were back on the streets of Columbus in 2007, riding around in my first car with my sister & dreaming of the limitless possibilities of the future ahead of us.

***

In under 96 hours, I journeyed up and down nearly all the highways of my life. I witnessed my limitless capacity for love in every phase of it.

In the five pictures in this piece, the brilliant smiles speak to this fundamental truth. In 2024, after years of shying away from the light, I stand proudly as a Black socialist minister who is primarily doing the work in the American South by tapping into the continuity of my love. Each of these people has so richly contributed to this life-defining realization, and - within the omniscience of the time loop - I’m so fortunate that I can now more easily lean into the previous epochs of my life to continually honor my cherished purpose.